Tonight's post is a letter to a person that has been in my life since she was born. I didn't put a name in it because I share a bit of personal info. I really hope she sees this, a lot of terrible things happened between us and I heard she may be feeling suicidal... so I wrote this for her. I hope you like it.
Hey You,
I named this post after a song we used to dance to together back in 2003. Hopefully you'll listen to it.
We were best friends since birth... but one day it went totally wrong. What happened was not okay.
I remember you as a very out-spoken, yet quiet person. You've always been short, brunette, and your feet take up most of your body. I remember because we spent almost every day together. Our parents were such good friends and your baby sister... Jace loved taking care of her sometimes. I think he misses that.
I heard that she is now in what? 4th grade? Hell, I remember whenever we both went to see your mother in the hospital after she had her. You were my best friend...
My other friends, well, you didn't like them. That was okay. I learned that it was normal for you to dislike my friends because we were so close.
You were going through a hard time then, I believe... I think that was maybe when your mum became addicted to something... I don't really remember what... Or maybe not...
She used to make chocolate pie. She was a very sassy woman, shall I say. I remember when she would be rude to you and your sister. Inside I wanted to slap her across the face, but outside I agreed never to do whatever we had all done ever again...
I remember upstairs in your room you introduced me to Michael Jackson and Taylor Swift... what an odd combo. I remember you teaching me to say "Oh my God" instead of "Oh my gosh" because it didn't really matter what other people thought of what words came from my mouth.
I remember you telling me you didn't want me to be a part of your life anymore.
I understand you were still going through that hard time...
But I feel it's time to come back into your life...
So here I go...
I heard you've been cutting yourself.
By who? I shall not name. He saw scars on your arm as you insulted him in school.
Honey, you will be okay. Hurting people is not okay.
Not that guy, not me, not my old friends and not yourself.
You hurt me, and you hurt me good. I won't even start with the physical pain you brought me only because you didn't know how else to deal with your family issues. You've been moving from house to house because who knows why... You may be going to court soon... I don't know how I can get to you but I am writing you this letter because I'm worried.
I am addicted to self-harm. That cutting you're doing to yourself is not worth it. I don't know for sure if this is what you're doing because I haven't seen it, but you and your sister can not go on like this, and I do not want either of you to end your lives with that rope tied to your tree that we would swing on years ago.
No matter what you did to me, I love you.
Nothing is ever going to change that because I love everyone. Everyone deserves happiness.
What you're going through will pass. You are an amazing human being and so is your sister. I miss you both so much and if I could run over to your house right now, hug you, and tell you it was okay I would.
I know you don't want me in your life anymore,
but it's time I come back.
Love,
Angel Elizabeth Matthews.
And I will never get over seeing your sister last year, whenever my dad came over to fix your dads truck, with curly strawberry blonde hair in the same style as mine at the time, yelling "Angel!" through the screen door and begging to come give me one last hug...
